Meeting Somewhere After
by donmaribello
Summary: Post-mockingjay. Peeta came back but then disappeared for two years while Katniss stayed. They each dealt with their own demons and found their peace. They've both changed but maybe not so much. So what happens when they see each other again?
1. Chapter 1

He tossed and turned on the living room couch, trying to find a comfortable position for his midday snooze when Katniss barged through the door.

He narrowed his blood shot eyes at his surly roommate.

She leaned against the front door, out of breath, "He's here."

He grunted, bothered at his napping interruption, "What?"

Katniss raised her voice, "He's back!"

Haymitch sat up, rubbing his forehead to quell a slow looming headache, "Who?"

"Peeta. I was at the train station waiting for my mom's package but then… I spotted him before he saw me," Katniss said crossing the room and sinking into the arm chair neighboring the couch.

He raised an eyebrow, "And?"

She shrugged, "I ran all the way back here."

"Well, isn't that convenient," he said lying back down.

"Shut up," he heard her reply with grit, as he closed his eyes.

"Okay, so now what," he asked.

Katniss looked out the window, imploring luck not to see an approaching figure, "What?"

"Well, it looks like we're not throwing a welcoming parade. So are we going to be pained at his arrival? Resentful?" he asked opening one eye to look at Katniss, "Relieved?"

She huffed getting irritated, "We're not going to be anything. I'm going hunting."

She stood up and left the room, to retrieve her bow and quiver.

"You won't be able to avoid him forever, if he's back," Haymitch bellowed after her, shifting his pillow and turning on his side toward the back of the couch.

A few moments later she crossed the room again on her way out, telling the back of his head, "I- look if he shows up just tell him the truth, I'm not around."

He waited until the backdoor's screech announced her departure to think out loud, "If only, then maybe I'd get some damn sleep."

* * *

After Katniss's announcement he had expected the appearance on his door step, but that didn't stop him from waking up irritated to the heavy knocks.

As he approached the door he saw two blond heads loitering on his porch through the adjacent window.

When he swung the door open it was the boy who greeted him, "Haymitch."

Haymitch stared, cataloging the sight of Peeta Mellark. He had built his body back to a toned frame, no longer the thin thing that had lingered here for about two weeks after being released from Dr. Aurelius's care, before disappearing for two years instead. He looked better now, healthy and happy. Well, at least at peace if not happy, he thought eyeing the pretty and familiar blonde next to him.

The only telltale signs of having survived a track list of two hunger games, a war, and torture were his faded scars.

And with that thought in mind, he pulled Peeta into a second long man hug, "It's good see you alive boy."

Peeta patted him on the shoulder after they let go, "You too old man."

Haymitch scoffed and looked in the direction of the girl awkwardly standing to the side.

Peeta on cue, introduced, "You remember Delly?"

"Hello," she said a little too chirpy for his taste and notably nervous.

"Hey there," he offered politely.

She smiled and quickly interjected, "I should probably let you talk alone."

Peeta smiled at her and handed her a pair of keys presumably to his house.

"I'll get started on unpacking," she stated.

"See you later," she told Haymitch as she walked away and waved.

He made a flick of a wave in response and stared after her alongside Peeta.

"I guess it should make sense," he said after the girl was out of ear range.

Peeta's brows furrowed, "Huh?"

Haymitch leaned against his door frame, crossing his arms, "That'd you move on with one of those type?"

Peeta cleared his throat to dissuade the misunderstanding, but with curiosity asked, "What type?"

"An optimistic," Haymitch said disgusted.

Peeta stared before replying solemnly, "Leave her alone. She's a good person and no we're not together."

Haymitch pondered, "Hmm."

"She came with me here, together, but she's just going to stay in my house, until she finds her own ground to step on," he added.

"Right," Haymitch responded.

"So how have things been around here," Peeta asked changing the subject.

Haymitch stepped away from the door and motioned for him to come in finally, "See for yourself."

The place didn't look immaculate but it certainly was a drastic change from when Haymitch used to live alone. It was clean and organized, there were no vile stains or smells anymore. All his liquor bottles were confined neatly to a place on the far kitchen counter. The house looked cozy and lived in.

"I heard she- I heard Katniss was living with you," Peeta said at last.

He turned to face Haymitch, who now sat on the arm chair in the living room.

"How is she doing," he asked.

Haymitch eyed him cautiously, before taking a sip from a flask he'd left on the coffee table, "So you still care to know?"

"What is that supposed to mean," Peeta asked with involuntary exasperation.

Haymitch shrugged, "Two years of radio silence says a lot."

Peeta lowered his voice, "Look, I am sorry I never had the courage to keep communication, but I'm not sorry I left. I'm not going to apologize for staying away to get my mind and life back in order."

Haymitch looked him in eyes, "Have you?"

Peeta nodded taking a seat on the couch, "Yes or I wouldn't be here."

Haymitch closed his flask, "So how long do you plan to stay this time?"

Peeta ignored his derision, "I plan to rebuild my parent's bakery."

Peeta waited but asked again, because he needed to know, "So how is she?"

Haymitch didn't answer right away before finally relenting, "She's okay."

"And she's not around right now, if that's what you're wondering," he added with defiance.

Peeta nodded again and stood up, "If you two are not busy, I'd like to invite you over for dinner. Say around 6?"

"I'll bring it up," was all Haymitch could avow.

* * *

Later in the day, Katniss came in through the back door with a ghost of a smile on her face. The woods were her salvation from brooding and over thinking. There she found the welcomed distractions that constructively, also paved way to large hauls of game.

"I take it Greasy Sae was pleased today," Haymitch said sauntering down the stairs and finding her setting up the table to clean whatever remaining carcass she kept for their dinner.

"Turkey," Katniss said proudly holding up the dead bird by the feet.

Haymitch slumped into a chair around the table, "A nice way to get wide and plump."

Katniss dried a recently washed knife with a satin napkin, "What do you mean?"

"A fat turkey and hearty bread," Haymitch said rubbing his belly.

"I didn't trade for bread today," she replied in regret.

"No need to. The boy came and went, but not before inviting us over for dinner," he said slowly measuring her reaction.

Katniss hands stilled, it's not that she had forgotten. On the contrary, since she had seen him alone buying some snacks from a concession stand that now existed by the train station, all her thoughts were consumed by Peeta. The woods had provided a leveling relief, but they were now flooding back. She had determined upon leaving that she would not avert from her everyday routine just because he was back. Two years of distance and absence had served to drive away any connection they could have ever had after the rebellion. Now, they were just two people who once used to know each other. At least that's what she had told herself, but hypocritically had acted with caution getting back, to avoid running into him.

"If you want to go that is," Haymitch said into the silence, leaving the choice to her.

They were bound to be neighbors apparently, so why not just get the first encounter over with, at least Haymitch would be there to avoid obstinate tension.

She nodded, "Okay. What time?"

Haymitch looked at the clock over his shoulder, "6?"

It was around 4:45 PM now, "Can you clean this then? I'm going to go wash up."

Haymitch smirked, "Oh yeah, do make yourself pretty."

"Don't start," she said coldly. She wouldn't put up with his mocking about star-crossed lovers shit this time around.

"I'm just warning you, sweetheart," he said in his condescending trademark.

As she made her way up the stairs he threw in, "The boy brought competition."

**AN: I've always wanted to see a plot like this unfold where they defeated their demons on their own and then met somewhere in between. Stick around to see if we get somewhere with this. **


	2. Chapter 2

In the seconds they reached Peeta's house, a cluster of thoughts ruptured in her mind.

She doesn't know how she's supposed to act around him.

How do you treat the person who by a comradery of struggle and suffering, went from being a stranger, to friend, to almost lover, and back to stranger?

By that knowledge, she never blamed him for leaving. It just never made it hurt less.

She's the fool though, she allowed herself to hope when he planted those primrose bushes outside her house two years ago. A failed hope that she wouldn't be alone from then on.

But everything in her life has always been rooted to the abandonment of others, she should have been used to it. Still, his sent her to the deep end of a depression spawned not by her ill forsaken life as whole, but by the single loss of the person who mattered most to her. _Prim._

However, he had done her a favor, with slow agonizing time she had to learn to find peace with solitude. Her future had diverged into two roads. She took the one nobody had expected her to take and that's what made all the difference. She took the road that led back to the woods and learning to be okay. Somewhere in the last year she did, she learned to be if nothing else, okay.

It was Haymitch's obnoxious knocking that brought her out of her trance.

He looked back at her, with a knowing smirk.

She narrowed her eyes, "Say something and I swear-"

Her threat was cut short when a much transformed Delly greeted them, gone was the pasty-faced, lumpy girl, with yellowish hair. In her place was a pretty, hour glass shaped woman with wavy tresses.

Katniss offered a polite smile.

Delly beamed, "Katniss, is it really you?"

Katniss guessed she must look different too. On one of her worst days she had taken to pair of scissors and cut down to the roots of her singed hair. It had symbolized many things to her, but Greasy Sae had thought she'd finally gone insane. For a long time, she had sported an uneven boy cut until it grew back and Greasy Sae had trimmed it for her. It was now only a bit above being shoulder length. Somewhere along with the help of her old prep team's bottles, it had grown back stronger and lusher. It had matched her body's progress because being in and eating off the woods every day for the last year had shaped her physique. She even wore a simple dress tonight, that exposed some her faded scars. A part of her was still the same in wanting to prove a familiar point. It was that she could do it on her own, even if that wasn't necessarily true. Still, she wanted to look just as good as Peeta had in the fleeting sight she caught off him, to prove that she had also half succeeded in not being a broken shell any more.

"Hello Delly," she said at last after the brief pause.

"You look so different," Delly said in awe.

"Thanks… so how was the train ride," she asked changing subjects.

"Long, unfortunately," she said with a tired smile.

In the background, there was some noise of approaching steps and then there he was, "Is that-?"

He dried wet hands on his pants and his eyes landed on hers. They could only stare at each other.

Peeta opened his mouth, but no words came out.

When the stare was becoming too long for appropriate, he finally spoke, "Hi."

"Hey," she acknowledged back to the stranger wearing Peeta's face.

Delly opened the door wider, "Come in?"

Haymitch who had been standing to the side with a smug expression, motioned forward the cooking pan he had been carrying in one arm, "We brought turkey."

"I'm sorry, it's kind of plain and poorly seasoned. Haymitch told me about your invitation too late to make anything more out of it," she lied walking in after Haymitch.

"Are you kidding? It smells great and Peeta baked some raisin nut bread that'd go great with this," Delly said taking the pan from Haymitch.

Peeta and Katniss kept eye contact, until she began feeling anxious.

She looked to Delly instead, "Need help?"

The blonde waved her off, "Oh no it's fine. I have a dish on the stove, just make yourself comfortable while it's finished."

"Okay… thank you," she said to her retreating back.

Peeta looked between Haymitch and her as he led them to the living room, "Would you like something to drink?"

"I'd like a shot of anything you have that counts as alcohol, thanks," Haymitch gruffed.

"Haymitch-," she began to scold.

"It's okay, I came prepared," Peeta said offering the old man a brand new bottle of Spirytus.

"A gift from the Capitol," he shrugged.

Haymitch beamed as he took it and went off in search of a glass, "I knew there was a reason to like you."

Katniss crossed her arms, sitting on an arm chair, "If he throws up on Delly's meal later, don't blame me."

"I won't," Peeta chuckled.

She stared, she had forgotten what his laugh sounded like.

Peeta sat down on the couch, instead of wandering after Haymitch, "So how'd you end up living with him anyway?"

She scoffed, "That's a long story." _And a tragic one._

He nodded, "So does your house stay empty?"

She shook her head, "No. Greasy Sae and her granddaughter live there."

"Really? I should have invited them over too," he said.

Katniss averted the lingering gaze and looked around the living room, "No, they usually get home late. They have a food booth at what's kind of the new Hob except it's you know…" she braved looking back at him, "legal now."

He nodded again, "Right."

Katniss couldn't think of any good ice breakers, so she said the first thing that came to mind after an awkward silence, "Delly's still the sweet girl I remember."

"She is," Peeta said with a small smile, not giving much of a conversation.

Katniss brushed invisible dust off the hem of her dress, "So how'd you two end up together?"

"That's a long story," Peeta joked, thinking for a moment she referred to their trip here.

She nodded with a forced smile.

They didn't say much after that, until an expression passed over Peeta.

"Oh wait. No, you think- We're not-, " he began but was interrupted by Delly.

"The table is set," she said warmly.

* * *

Dinner had passed in an awkward nuisance, at least from where Katniss had sat. She was irritated with the small talk, her poorly cooked turkey, Haymitch, and herself. All while forcing herself to hide it under cordial behavior. They had all avoided matters of the past and that left only so much to be said. As well as, neither Katniss nor Peeta seemed willing to talk about the two years in between then and now. From the interesting things that were said Katniss gathered Peeta's stay seemed to be for the long run. He planned to rebuild his family's bakery and when that led to talks about permits and paperwork, Delly brought up she wanted to work in the new Justice Building. Katniss didn't offer much about herself, instead she talked about the new things the reconstruction had produced. It was a civil dinner, until Haymitch knocked out cold on the table having accomplished to slowly, but surely finish the whole liquor bottle Peeta gave him. They had all been busy trying to keep the conversation going to notice, until it left Peeta having to half carry, half drag him back to their house.

"What do you with him when he gets like this," Peeta said as he propped Haymitch down in a sitting position on the couch.

"I don't do anything," Katniss said with crossed arms as Haymitch slumped to the side, head falling on the arm rest.

"What do you mean," Peeta asked receding back near her.

"He doesn't usually have any reason to be outside the house, so he just passes out on the couch or his room," she shrugged.

Peeta raised his eyebrows, "And you're okay with it?"

Katniss scowled, "It's not this bad usually since the liquor he's used to isn't potent. He's like immune to it now, so he really only drowses off and falls asleep. I guess this time is just your fault."

"My fault," Peeta repeated in indignation.

"Yeah, you brought him the liquor," she said and with a smirk added, "and the excitement of seeing you again."

Peeta guffawed, "Ha, so you've developed a sense of humor."

He meant it to be taken lightly, but she didn't.

"Come on, I'll walk you out," she said instead with a small smile.

"Please, apologize to Delly on his behalf," she added trailing behind Peeta as he walked to the front door.

Peeta stepped out onto the porch before he replied, "She knew how he could get, don't worry."

They stood there staring at each other for seconds too long.

"So uh… if you're not busy one of these days maybe you could reintroduce me to the district," he said finally.

"Yeah, maybe," Katniss answered knowing it was a probable no.

"And I still want to hear the story of how this happened," he said gesturing to the house, hence her living situation.

She nodded and Peeta covered a yawn with his hand.

"Sorry," he said after, "It was a long trip."

"You should go… get some sleep and I better get back and place a bucket by Haymitch. He usually makes it to the bathroom now, but who knows this time around," she said politely.

"Right, well goodnight then, Katniss," Peeta said, her name sounding foreign coming from his mouth.

She said goodnight and watched him move to the stairs, before he stopped and turned again.

"Katniss-," he said stopping.

_"I'm glad to see you're doing good. Can we meet up sometime and talk alone? Me and Delly aren't together. Do you hate me? What are you thinking?" he wanted to finish._

It was all out of place. She owed him no answers.

"-umm …never mind. Goodnight."

"Goodnight Peeta," she responded back.

She closed the door and leaned against it taking a deep needed breath.


	3. Chapter 3

Peeta spent the week systematically cleaning and rearranging his abandoned belongings around the house. He had never been materialistic, so separating from them hadn't really been a problem two years ago. He had simply locked up windows and doors, wishing everything inside good luck.

He hadn't known what to expect upon his return, only worrying about thieves and damage until he was stepping through the door. However, he'd often hoped Katniss and Haymitch would keep an eye on it from afar.

It was a futile thought, when he had never actually said his goodbyes to either of them. He had just packed two duffel bags and left in the morning, just as the sun was coming up. He could have probably been able to be absent a few days before Haymitch would've noticed and maybe weeks before Katniss noticed. They were both busy battling their own demons in the immediate months after the war ended.

However, it had been Greasy Sae who had caught him at the gates of Victor's Village as he was leaving and she was coming, presumably to Katniss's. She had glanced at his face and at the bags, and only shook her head in disapproval. They both had just kept walking in their intended directions. He hadn't tried to give explanations and she had made no action to stop him.

His explanations had nothing and everything to do with Katniss. He had been sent home too early and every night for the two weeks had been spent fighting off an episode. How could he explain that he had visited the bakery's ruins and walked over his dead family's ashes? How could he explain that when he saw his boots' footprints later that day on the kitchen floor, he had realized the ghosts had followed him home? How could he face the girl, who together with him, even without the intentions, had angered Snow and caused this? How could he be near the girl, who his mind told him was a stranger, all while his body craved her familiarity? It had been too much and like he told Haymitch, he was not sorry he left.

His residence in the two years had been sporadic. He had gone back to Dr. Aurelius in the Capitol. He had asked for help and privacy. He had spent his time in between painting buried memories, attending therapy sessions, baking for charities, and overall healing. After a few months, when it got out that the infamous victor was in the Capitol, Dr. Aurelius had sent him to District 4. It had been a new life living by the ocean where had learned to swim, fish, and occasionally visit Annie and little Finn. On one occasion he had run into Delly's little brother, who was under apprentice to be a doctor in the hospital where little Finn had his check-ups. Apparently, Delly was still in District 13, studying to work in legislation. Through her brother they initiated contact, until he eventually even convinced her to come out to visit once she graduated. Then he had a strange encounter with Mrs. Everdeen, who worked in the same hospital. Something awful clicked with him that day. In parallel, they had once both loved Katniss and proved the extent of it by deserting her when she needed them the most. When Dr. Aurelius called Peeta to come back to the Capitol for some new test trials on his condition, it hadn't taken much convincing. Delly got her accreditations in law and came to visit Peeta in the Capitol, after seeing her brother in 4. After two years, Peeta had deemed himself sane enough to go home and Delly jumped at his offer to accompany him, especially after they heard of District 12's reconstruction along with a new Justice Building.

And far more surprising than finding his house untouched other than by the natural dusting, was Katniss Everdeen. She was the only thing on his mind coming back, imagining her to be as frail and broken as when he had left. At the other extreme, he imagined he would find her cold and distant, hating him for leaving. He had managed to get out of Dr. Aurelius at some point, without betraying patient confidentiality, that she was picking up his phone calls. He had also heard from Annie on his last days at 4, that she had forgiven her mother. He hadn't known what to make of that information. However, he never had anticipated the Katniss that showed up on his doorstep, wearing a dress and spunk dancing in her eyes.

She had thrown his expectations out the window, her braid gone and polite conversation leaving her lips. Yet, when he was alone with her after Haymitch passed out, he recognized the old things about her. The rare joke and her acquainted scowl. He was mesmerized and his thoughts were so preoccupied about her again, that they might as well be back in the arena.

It was one of those thoughts that led him to Haymitch's door step, a week and a half after his return.

He was just about to knock, when the door suddenly swung inward.

"Peeta," Katniss said shocked.

"Hey, sorry, I was just about to knock," he stated.

Katniss stilled on the door frame, "Is everything alright?"

He frowned, "Yeah, why?"

"Your face is beet red," she said simply, without a double meaning.

"No, I'm fine. I just finished baking, but I kind of got carried away," he said as a preamble to his invitation.

"Oh," Katniss said unsure.

He added quickly, "Now, I have more pastries than Delly and me can eat, so we were wondering if you and Haymitch were free?"

She adjusted a quiver of arrows on her back, "What do you mean?"

He stared at her hand carrying the bow, a flash of memories passing in seconds.

He shook them off and returned to her questioning gaze, "If you weren't busy, maybe you'd like to join us for lunch?

"Well, Haymitch is taking a nap, but you're more than welcome to rouse him up," she said with a hint of a smile.

He smirked, "I pass, I don't want him swinging his knife at me just yet. But what about you?"

She lifted her bow as explanation, "I was just heading out."

"Do you want to take one to go at least," he offered lamely.

"No," she said stepping onto the porch.

And when she finished closing the door behind her, added, "-but thank you."

"Sure," he said trying to hide his disappointment.

"So I'll see you around then," she said passing by him.

He had the urge to pull her into a hug.

"Yeah," he said, restraining his hands in his jean pockets and nodding.

* * *

Another two weeks came and went with the growing inclination that Katniss didn't want much to do with Delly or him. Whenever they saw her leaving and going through Victor's Village, she was polite but never exchanging more than a few words. He made more attempts to invite the odd pair of Haymitch and her over again. One time, she hadn't been home and Haymitch had waved him away saying thanks but no thanks, muttering about his needed beauty sleep. The other time, she had said they were going to join Greasy Sae out at the new Hob.

He wasn't oblivious, yes it was awkward trying to pick up even an acquaintanceship after all this time, but he was trying. He even wondered if Katniss thought Delly and he were a couple, but it'd be weird to correct out of the blue. She had to know they weren't though, he had cleared that matter with Haymitch.

Whatever her reasons, he had no right to question her about them anyway. He focused instead on getting everything in order to establish and build the bakery.

After visiting the new Justice Building, he realized that was going to be another kind of hassle.

He was walking out the sand stone structure and flipping through the folder of papers, when he looked up to see Katniss crossing a few yards away.

"Katniss," he yelled after her in surprise.

She made a full turn searching for the source that called after her. He was about to shout again, when she saw him and offered a single wave.

He walked over to her.

"Hey," she said first.

He eyed her empty game bag, "Good hunt?"

"Yeah," she said with a genuine smirk.

"You're in a good mood," he said not being able hide his liking to it.

"So good, I even got Haymitch a present," she said showing him a bottle of white liquor.

"So what are you doing out here," she asked as she put it back in her game bag.

He pointed to the building behind him, "I came to fill out some paperwork for the bakery."

"How's that going," she asked.

He sighed, "Eh, my permit to rebuild got approved…"

"But?" she asked when he trailed off.

"Well call it morbid, but I wanted to reconstruct on the site my parent's used to be," he specified.

A look passed over her face but she nodded, "No, I can imagine why you would want to."

He was quiet for a moment.

"Umm so what's the problem then," she asked, trying to avoid uncomfortable silences.

"Someone else has the deeds to the property. I guess the government had been desperate to begin reconstruction, they sold it even it wasn't theirs to sell," he answered with a hint of sorrow.

She agreed, but asked instead, "So what do you plan to do?"

"Talk to the owner. Make an offer to buy and pray they accept," he responded.

The consolation prize the new government had endowed the surviving victors with, money. They were each allowed to keep the bank account the old government had incremented under their name. Peeta saw it as a quick scheme to ease the guilt. He hated it, but if it meant getting the bakery back up, he wouldn't turn away from using it. He knew Katniss enough to know she refused to take a single coin from it.

"Hope it happens then," she said with sincerity.

He smiled, "So are you heading home? We could walk together, if you are."

"No, I'm actually waiting for someone," she said taking a glance over his shoulder.

"I should get going then," he resolved.

"Say hi to Delly for me," she threw in.

"Oh, that reminds me," he recollected out loud.

She furrowed her eyebrows, "What?"

"She'd told me to ask you any time I saw you, if you had the new phone number for the hospital your mother works in," he said carefully.

"Why," she asked suspiciously, as he knew she would.

"You know the hospital changed landlines and her brother works there too. He gave her the new number, but it got lost on the trip here," he clarified.

"Oh, yeah I could get it to her," she said once convinced.

"Thank you," he said.

Katniss interested asked, "Speaking of Delly, has she asked about positions in the Justice Building?"

"Yeah, but it's a long process getting hired apparently, background checks and-" he began to explain but stopped when Katniss beamed a smile he hadn't seen in a long time. The kind that formed a small dimple under her bottom lip and just above her chin.

"Hey," someone echoed behind him

"Hey you," Katniss answered back, looking over Peeta's shoulder.

It was a guy he was familiar with, but couldn't place a name to as he came around and stood by Katniss.

"Peeta did you know Thom," Katniss introduced.

Peeta stared for a second at the fit guy with dark hair and gray eyes. He had been from the Seam obviously and a soldier in 13.

"From a distance, hi," he said at last, offering a handshake.

"Hello," Thom said returning it concisely.

"Thom works on the council of the Justice Building," Katniss stated.

Peeta's eyebrows rose, "Oh, I didn't take you for a politician."

Thom smirked, "I know who'd of thought a coal miner in office."

Yeah, Peeta remembered now, one of Gale Hawthorne's friends. Thom was from that same breed, the easily tempered one.

"That's not what I meant," Peeta retorted with an equal tone.

Thom looked over at Katniss, "No, I know, it's just we all have to play a part making sure this country doesn't go backwards again."

"So Thom, do you think could use your connections to get a friend hired," she said instead, adjusting her game bag on her shoulder.

"Depends who it is," Thom said eyeing Peeta.

"Delly Cartwright," Peeta interjected, mirroring his look.

Thom nodded, "I could ask around."

Katniss gave a small smile between them, "Good, so I'll let you know then Peeta, on both things."

"Okay, thank you," he said simply.

She nodded and began to retreat.

"It was nice to meet you," Thom said, before following Katniss.

"You too," he replied, matching his deadpan.

As they walked away, he saw Katniss say something and Thom laugh at her words. He put his arm around her shoulder briefly, before Katniss elbowed him on the side. Thom only laughed again.

Peeta couldn't help stare after them pathetically, trying to deter the inexplicable jealousy starting to boil under his skin. He had repeat to himself he had no reason or right to feel any of it.

And yet.

**AN: Thank you for those who took an interest in this story. Sorry for bad grammar or typos. I'm lazy and impulsive so I tend to post after I finish typing, revising once or twice at most. Sorry if it ruins the flow.**


	4. Chapter 4

1 year and 6 months ago.

_Katniss bathed in the afternoon and vowed to eat all her dinner later, for the sake of Greasy Sae. She didn't want her existence to be any more of a burden than it already was._

_Hadn't the woman done enough? It had been her wrinkled hands that removed the thorns out of Katniss's, when she had ripped out the primrose bushes months ago. It had been Greasy Sae who had picked up the glass shards, after she had broken all the mirrors in the house the other month. It had been Greasy Sae who had swept the long, sporadically singed hair off the floor last week, after she had chopped it off at random in front of the fireplace._

_It had been tough Greasy Sae, who hugged her this morning, after she saw Katniss's clumsily bandaged wrist._

_Katniss hadn't thought of killing herself last night, not this time at least. She had just wanted to feel something other than loneliness and longing for Prim. She hadn't cut deep enough, but deep enough to feel pain. It was the familiar type, the type she had lived in the arena and that had unmoved her rather quickly. She had cleaned her wrist, put antibiotic ointment on, bandaged it, and gone to bed feeling both accomplished and disappointed._

_This morning Greasy Sae had discovered it though, and without judgement had simply pulled her into an embrace. _

_However, now at dinner she had come in with an almost sober Haymitch trailing behind her. Greasy Sae had her work life in between the meals she brought Katniss and a granddaughter to look after. The ultimatum presented to Katniss was a call to Dr. Aurelius or moving in with Haymitch._

_The choice was easy._

_She figured living with her alcoholic mentor was a better bet than being sent to a foreign psychotic ward._

* * *

It took two days, but she finally had the information Peeta wanted. The hospital phone number and Thom's connections. So here she was walking to Peeta's, with uncertainty and determination to hand it over.

The run into each other near the Justice Building had been awkward. How was she supposed to have introduce a man who mattered to her to another who never stopped mattering, because the boy with the bread was still there?

She had realized it as soon as she had closed the door on Peeta, the night of his return.

He mattered regardless of time and distance, because she had been so wrong. He hadn't come back a stranger. In that short time he'd carried Haymitch to their house, she had recognized more traces of the old Peeta, the one the Capitol kidnapped and tortured into an actual stranger. She wanted to know about his time away, if had beaten the flashbacks and regained his memories, and if he thought part of his love would make it back to her.

She had wanted to run after him and into the past where he loved her. But she would sound selfish and insane saying it to him, so she didn't. Instead, she played her best card, evasion. She kept unexpected encounters short and polite. She graciously turned down lunch and dinner invitations.

New or old Peeta, he caused uncertainties in her and complicated her actions, as he always had.

She didn't want to dwell on it right now though, instead she raised her fist to knock on Peeta's door.

"Hey," Peeta answered with a smile after the third knock.

"Hi," she offered.

"So what's up," he asked.

"Is Delly here," she asked herself, searching the background behind him for the blonde.

"No, she went to visit some of her family's old acquaintances from town," he replied.

"The few who made it," Peeta added on an afterthought.

Katniss didn't acknowledge that last part.

"Oh, well here then, it's the hospital's phone number," she said, pulling a scrap of paper from her pocket.

"I'll give it her, thanks," Peeta responded, glancing down at it after she handed it to him.

"No problem. Thom would also like to meet with her for an interview this Monday," she informed him.

Peeta raised an eyebrow, "He moved fast."

Katniss looked confused at what he meant.

"She had asked about positions before and told they weren't hiring," he explained.

"Oh, well he'll get her in. I'll make sure," she asserted.

"Thank you," he said sincerely.

"Alright, then I should get going," she stated quickly.

"Do you have some place to be," he asked out of curiosity.

"I was going to go eat lunch at Sae's booth," Katniss answered.

"Oh, okay," he said, readying his hand to close the door once she left.

Katniss's brain willed her mouth to stay shut, but failed, "Would you like to come with me?"

"If you're not busy that is," she added lamely.

Peeta smiled, "No, I'm not. I'll go."

* * *

They made small talk on the brief walk to the new Hob. It wasn't until they entered the premises that Katniss's face lit up. She was somewhere she belonged and she led Peeta toward her favorite booth.

In these two years, Greasy Sae had filled the role her mother had abandoned. Katniss had always respected the old woman, but now she had an equal affection for her too.

She owed Greasy Sae for recovering most, if not, some of her sanity. While the Haymitch living situation had been coerced on her and took time getting used to, it had been her saving grace. The best form of therapy had come in Haymitch's presence, as hard as it was to believe. They had both been plagued by nightmares at night and somehow, at some point had taken to sitting in front of his fireplace, together. Katniss had sat on the floor wrapped in a blanket and he had sat on the armchair taking sips from a bottle. It had begun as a silent comradery, until the night Katniss asked why he chose to save her in the first games over Peeta.

His answer had been, "You knew how to survive."

It had begun with that question, but it didn't end there. They were fed by Greasy Sae mornings and evenings, but late at night it was them two who talked about everything in chronological order.

One night she had finally asked the question that burned in her soul, if he thought it was all her fault, the war and the destruction.

His answer had been, "No, you were just a scared kid. It had never been under your control."

It had been the first night she had understood and accepted anything post-Prim.

She had been so grateful to Greasy Sae's inadvertent favor , she started taking care of herself from then on. She had begun with making her own meals and feeding herself, and by extension Haymitch.

It had also been about a year ago that the old woman and her granddaughter were displaced from their makeshift home. It was on a site the government had wanted to plough and build another medicine factory on. Katniss had lived with Haymitch for six months by that time and without hesitation had offered her empty house to them.

Somehow the range age of loners had become a misfit family.

It was that reason that she hugged Greasy Sae on arrival. The old woman gave her a wrinkled smile and tenderly patted her back in the embrace.

Katniss reintroduced Peeta and while Greasy Sae was polite, he could feel the apprehension. She served them two bowls of rabbit stew and when Peeta offered to pay she waved him away dismissively.

Katniss laughed as she led him to a small area with table benches.

"I hope I didn't offend her," he said, while knowing he had.

"She's just stubborn," Katniss answered with a smirk.

"Reminds me of someone," Peeta joked, enjoying this side of Katniss the old woman brought out.

Katniss smiled, but stirred her spoon in her bowl longer than needed, over thinking something.

"What is it," Peeta asked, unsure he said something wrong.

Katniss answered truthfully, "Last time, you said Delly's brother works in the same hospital as my mom."

Peeta nodded, "Yeah, he does."

He took a mouthful of his stew while he waited for Katniss to continue.

"Did umm- did you ever see her," she asked.

"Yes, once," he told her.

She ate some stew before asking, "Did she look okay?"

"She looked like she worked too hard," he said before eating a second helping.

"Oh," she said, staring at her spoon.

"But she also looked at peace there," Peeta stated, sensing her worry.

Katniss smiled at his kind remark, "Thank you."

She asked, "Were you in District 4 all this time?"

"No, when I left, I went back to Dr. Aurelius," he said.

She ate another mouthful.

"When the media found out I was in the Capitol, he sent me to District 4," he added before she could comment.

She didn't, she just gazed back with those gray eyes and he had to look back to his bowl for a second.

He ate another spoon of rabbit stew and she did too. He didn't know what were safe topics of conversation, so he took another bite. They both ate in silence for a few minutes.

He didn't want it to be only awkward silence, so he risked it, "I saw Annie often."

Katniss ate another spoonful of stew and seconds later replied, "She sent me a letter with a photo of her baby."

Peeta was surprised, "She never told me."

Katniss stayed quiet, so he added, "Finn's a cute kid huh."

Katniss nodded finally with a smile, "Yeah, poor Annie."

Peeta's brows furrowed, "What do you mean?"

"Imagine him as teenager with Finnick's looks and charms," she said joking, like she rarely did.

Peeta beamed in memory of their friend, "Agreed, poor Annie."

"How about you," Peeta asked, nearing the bottom of his bowl.

"What about me," Katniss asked.

_What happened to you all this time, while I left and you stayed?_

"I don't know. How did you end up living with Haymitch?" he asked instead.

"Oh yeah, long story," Katniss answered.

"I have time," Peeta retorted putting his spoon in his now empty bowl.

Katniss took a mouthful from hers, prolonging a reply.

Peeta relented, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I just-"

"No, it's fine. It just kind of gets grim," she said sincerely.

She wouldn't go into details, but there was no point in lying either. She had always been a bad liar and it's not like he can't figure out things were rough.

He seemed to have read her mind because he replied, "Katniss, my time away... it wasn't exactly a tale of excitement either."

She looked down to her bowl.

"How is living with him though," Peeta asked mockingly, trying to lighten the conversation.

Katniss snickered, "Ha, now there's the real sob story."

Peeta smiled.

"No, but in all honesty, he isn't so bad," she said with a smile.

"Wow," Peeta grimaced.

"I know," Katniss laughed, even if she loved Haymitch, saying nice things to him or about him didn't feel natural.

"That's a lot to take in," Peeta joked.

Katniss put her spoon in her drained bowl, "So what about you?"

"What do you mean," he responded.

"Delly and you," she said, looking him in the eyes, "If you don't mind me asking, how did you end up together?"

Peeta stammered, "Do you mean how did we end up here, in 12, together? …or did you mean as a couple?"

Katniss shrugged, "Both, I guess."

Here was his chance of correction, "Haymitch didn't mention that we're not together like that?"

"No," she said, shaking her head and regretting any nice adjectives about Haymitch.

"We're not dating. He asked me when we got here, but I made it clear we're just friends-" Peeta told her.

"-but you live together," Katniss interjected swiftly, sounding more interested than she should.

"-and we sleep in separate rooms," Peeta finished seemingly.

"Delly doesn't have anyone else here. She's staying with me until she can get a job and a place to live in."

"Oh," Katniss said feeling like an idiot.

Peeta stayed quiet for a moment before he stated, "Katniss, I know this all feels uncomfortable, to put it in one word, but I want- if you-"

He sighed, before finally concluding, "Would you ever consider the possibility of being friends... again?"

She didn't answer immediately, so he continued, "I know it's been too long and I don't have a right to-"

"Yes," Katniss said much to his surprise.

He heard her clearly, but wanting to make sure asked, "What?"

"Yes, it is all weird, but I do want to try to be friends," Katniss smiled, with that special dimple smile.

"Okay," Peeta said, trying to hide the sudden feeling of elation.

In a second of buzzkill, he thought out loud, "Your boyfriend won't mind?"

Katniss raised an eyebrow, "What boyfriend?"

"Thom," Peeta said.

"He's not my boyfriend. He's a friend too." she clarified.

"Oh, okay," Peeta said his smile returning.

Katniss faintly blushed and motioned to his bowl instead, "So did you like Sae's soup?"

"Yeah, I did. I really did," Peeta said with a deeper meaning.

"Good," Katniss smiled.

**AN: Tell me what you think of this chapter?**


	5. Chapter 5

_1 year ago._

_A stack of broken twigs snapped under her step and the targeted creature scurried off in a second. She lurched forward shooting the arrow too late and something else caught on her foot tripping her to the ground. _

"_Damn it," Katniss grumbled, slamming the dirt with a closed fist._

_She wasn't on top of her skills today. She was being unusually loud and she was barely making her shots. She knew part of the reason was the pressure she felt to provide Greasy Sae with enough game for the Equinox Festival. It was a celebration of the people, for rising from the ashes. It was similar in food and entertainment to what the Harvest Festival had been, even the victory over death. However, this time there was no oppression or hunger games looming in the back of people's minds. _

_Katniss didn't plan to attend, but she promised Greasy Sae meat for her booth at the merriment._

_She walked down through another trail and stopped as something caught her eye._

_A few feet ahead of her was a familiarly constructed snare. It wasn't hers and the only person who designed them that way was supposed to be ten districts away. She gripped her bow tighter, expecting Gale to appear at any second._

_She scoured the area with her vision, but saw nothing. When she heard branches bristling behind her she whipped around, preparing to aim. _

_She wouldn't really shoot Gale, would she? He was an issue that she hadn't come to terms with, a part of her knew he'd never dealt a hand in Prim's death intentionally. But what about the other children? She knew it had been Coin's doing, but Gale hadn't sought her out in all this time to offer explanations. To be honest though, she didn't know if she would listen._

_While her fight or flight system considered the encounter, she didn't realize the approaching person was someone else. _

"_Katniss," Thom said, startled._

_He was not surprised to see her in the woods, he was stunned at the arrow pointed in his direction._

_Katniss exhaled, "Thom, what are you doing here?"_

_She lowered her bow. Last time she saw him, he had hauled dead bodies toward the meadow with other men. It was he, who had informed her of the Madge's crestfallen fate._

"_I came to check, if I caught anything," he told her pointing to the empty snare behind her._

"_Is that your snare?"_

"_Yes," he answered to her astonishment._

"_I didn't know you knew how to hunt," she stated._

_He stepped closer, "I didn't, at least not until I got to 13."_

"_Did- Did Gale teach you his snare designs?"_

"_Yes, but I doubt he'll mind me using his techniques now," Thom said with firm words._

"_I haven't heard from him," he added._

"_Me either," Katniss revealed._

_Thom shrugged, "I guess the luxuries of a Capitol job are overwhelming."_

_She stayed silent._

_Although, Thom shared her disappointment in Gale deserting the people of 12 for a better life in District 2, he respected him._

_He admitted, "I don't blame him, I respect that he's helping rebuild a better country. If I got the chance, I would too even if on a smaller scale."_

_Katniss didn't want to talk about Gale or politics. She wanted nothing to do with the government._

_So instead she asked, "Did you just start your hunt?"_

"_Yeah, but I'm not having much luck," he scowled._

_Katniss nodded feeling the same about the fortune of the day._

"_Do you know how to use a bow and arrow?"_

_Thom laughed, "No, unfortunately."_

_She contemplated for seconds, but at last proposed, "Would you like to learn?"_

* * *

Peeta passed by Haymitch's house on his way back from town, in time to hear the man bellow inside

"Get out! And close the door behind you!"

Peeta stopped just a few feet from the porch, waiting for the commotion to continue.

In its place, the front door swung open with Katniss yelling over her shoulder.

"Alright I get it!"

After she saw slammed the door shut, she approached him with a smirk, confusing him about what was happening.

"Hey what's going," he asked curiously.

She scoffed, "Nothing, Haymitch's just being the typical ray of sunshine."

Peeta chuckled.

"But why is he so grouchy? More than usual that is."

"I told him I expected the house clean when I came back," she laughed.

Peeta smiled, "Who would have expected, Haymitch Abernathy the goody homemaker?"

Katniss stifled a snort and briefly adjusted loose pages between a book.

"So what's up," she asked looking up.

"I just came from town," he said.

"How was that?"

Peeta couldn't help his grin, "I have some good news to share."

Katniss smiled at his expression, "What is it?"

"The owner of the bakery's location accepted to sell," he said eagerly.

"That's great Peeta. I'm glad for you," she acclaimed with sincerity.

"Thank you. Truth is I kind of want to celebrate, but Delly doesn't come back from work until dinner. I planned to bake something special, so I was hoping Haymitch and you wouldn't mind joining us later?"

"No, not at all," Katniss reciprocated.

It was over a month and a half since Peeta had returned to District 12. After the day at Hob, they were less fretful to talk to each other. The conversations were still mildly safe in terms of past and present, but by circumstances they still spend time together. She would periodically accept his invitations to dinner now, while dragging Haymitch along. On other occasions, they would invite Delly and him over. Since Delly began working in the Justice Building three weeks ago, his afternoons were also free to hang out without concern of leaving her alone. It worked out because Katniss usually hunted in the mornings, so by the afternoon she was there when he would visit the Haymitch household. Some days Haymitch would tell them they talked too loud and to get the hell out of his house for his diurnal sleaze. They would mock him before departing to the Sae's booth together. It was a work in progress, but they were getting some semblance of a real friendship

"Great," Peeta answered shaking off his reverie, "Are you going to town?"

"No."

Katniss looked at him for a moment, before showing him the book she carried.

"Do you remember this?"

"Your family plant book," he recognized when she flipped a few pages in demonstration.

"Yeah, there is different breed of vegetation budding in the east of the forest. I've sketched them or more like trying to, but that's where I'm heading," she informed him.

He was surprised, but keenly succumbed, "Would you accept my help?"

She raised an eyebrow, "Really?"

"Yeah, I'll go get my sketchbook and color pencils," he smiled.

"Alright, I'll wait here," she acknowledged, flipping through her own black and white chicken scratches.

* * *

They walked toward the woods and it was surreal to Peeta stepping into the trees where the electrified fence had once existed. They hiked and made talk for twenty minutes and counting.

He related to her what the owner of the property had committed to and at what value he was buying it from said man. He described some of his blueprint plans and she suggested making bread samples for the Equinox Festival coming up in a few weeks. It could serve as a business trial she said and he agreed.

"It's a good thing you're not hunting," Peeta said with a loud breath. He was fit, but the terrain of the forest was a challenge to his physique, as it always had been.

Katniss walked slightly ahead of him, "What do you mean?"

"I imagine my footsteps are still too loud," he depreciated with humor.

"Oh right. Yeah, good thing I'm not hunting," she joked back.

She kept quiet, but then she topped suddenly. He almost collided into her slender frame.

"What's wrong?"

She turned to him, "I'm so stupid, I forgot about your leg. It's not bothering you?"

He smiled lifting up his pant leg to show her, "No, Dr. Aurelius hooked me up with the top of the line before I came back."

She exhaled in relief, "Good."

They started walking again, only Katniss slowed to his pace this time.

He was curious, "Do you talk to him?"

Katniss shrugged, "Only when it is mandatory. What about you?"

"Every week," he admitted.

Dr. Aurelius was a man Peeta appreciated for all the support he had given him in his time of need, professionally and not.

"Do you- Is it… never mind," Katniss settled.

Peeta gave her a side glance, "Katniss go ahead and ask me. We'll eventually have to bring up the difficult things."

After a long pause she asked, "Do you still have to differentiate the real and fake memories?"

He shuffled the strap of his backpack carrying his supplies on his shoulder.

"Yes and no. Sometimes there are small things the escape my implicit memory. They are unconscious and unintentional. Dr. Aurelius taught me to write them down with the time and place I believed they happened. I also write down the reason I think they are there. Then there is my explicit memory where my long term memories were… distorted. I learned to painted those and tell the difference if they still seemed too glossed over. I also learned to tell differences by checking facts, concepts, names, and other general information. It all works like my own database to the truth."

After his confession, Katniss nodded solemnly and remained quiet.

He stopped walking and she did too.

He turned to her, exchanging eye contact, "Katniss, I hope this isn't too much to say, though it probably is... I do still have flashbacks. They're rare now, but they're still there. But now, I know how to recognize the warnings and fight the symptoms. I just want you to know you don't have to worry about me being a danger to you."

In an abrupt action, she softly placed a hand on his shoulder, "I don't Peeta."

They stared at each other in wonder. When his own hand reached up to ghostly cover her hand, she retracted hers after a few seconds of contact.

She looked to the ground to regain her thoughts, before she looked back at him and made her confession.

"It took me about eight months, well if you start counting after you left... to come out here. The first days had been bittersweet. The whole world changed, but here... it was like time had never passed. It was unscathed of damage and sometimes without trying, for a fleeting second my mind would fool me."

Peeta didn't know how to respond, so he said something stupid.

"Did you ever tell Dr. Aurelius about it?"

Katniss snorted, "In some sort of terms, yeah."

"It's only now that you can realize how much they took from us," Peeta mourned for them both.

Katniss shook her head, "Yeah, but we're here now.

He was confused by her motion and words, "What do you mean?"

"I mean despite it all, we're still here. Snow didn't win, not over you and not over me."

He would have never thought to hear words like that escape her lips.

He didn't get to comment, because she began walking telling him over her shoulder, "Come on, we're almost there."

They reached the scene of colorful foliage. The plant book had been filled to the last page, so the new sketches Katniss added were basically loose parchment paper placed between the old ones. He commenced with rough draft sketches much to the appraisal of Katniss. They worked for an hour, more like he worked for an hour. At some point, Katniss had tossed her sketches in his direction and lied down on the grass, with her head on her own backpack and eyes closed.

At another instant, he had looked over to see her sun kissed faced with the dimpled smile on her lips. He was mesmerized and he stared for as long as he could, knowing he would try to recall this memory to paint later on.

She must have sensed his gaze, because she put her hand over her face to block the sun. He looked away before she opened her eyes.

"I almost forgot," she said sitting up.

She opened her back pack and pulled out a turkey sandwich. She split it in half and offered the other to him. She also brought out a container of strawberries and a bottle of water. They shared the lunch and an amiable silence.

Peeta wouldn't admit it yet, but this was part of what he had daydreamed coming home to. When they finished and he made some last touches on his sketches, they packed up to leave.

They trekked back the way they had come, until Katniss narrowed her eyes at something and diverted to side.

She waved him to keep up excitedly.

"Hey when is the last time you had squirrel?"

He lamented behind her, "Too long ago."

She pointed to some sort of hunter contraption by a tree, "How about some for your bakery celebration dinner?"

He smiled, "That doesn't need much persuasion."

She pulled a fat dead squirrel from what he recognized to be a snare.

"How many do you leave out here," he asked.

"About eight, but this one is Thom's," she said taking the plant book out of her back pack and placing the carcass inside.

He tried to hide his frown, "You bring him out here?"

Katniss shook her head, "We used to hunt together for a few months before he got his office job, but sometimes he still comes out on weekends for a catch. We bond over a taste for fresh meat ..." _and over the abandonment of Gale._

"Oh," he said, secretly satisfied with the answer.

"Hey, I say we go mess with Haymitch," she smiled with mischief in her eyes.

"How so," he said taking the plant book from her hands and carrying it.

"Wake him up, tell him to put an apron on, and make this ready to serve," Katniss teased pointing to her backpack.

"He'll probably throw a fit," Peeta grimaced.

Katniss lifted her hands in a gesture, "So?"

"Alright come on, let's go play dodge the liquor bottle," he relented.

She laughed genuinely and he had the desire to kiss her on the forehead.


	6. Chapter 6

Katniss eyed the door and the windows, wishing for an escape into the Saturday afternoon. This felt strange for too many reasons. She liked Delly, honest she did, especially after she had heard the blonde was starting to look for her own place in town. However, sitting around Peeta's table with her, chatting and embellishing paper was far from her comfort zone. She wasn't one for girl talk if this was what that was, and not to mention she had the decorating skills of a hollow log. She would rather be sitting in silence and skinning dead animals in Haymitch's kitchen. She doubted Delly could stand the sight of blood though, or keep quiet for that matter.

She had made it home from trading for new boots for Haymitch, when Delly caught her on the porch. She had tried to smoothly turn down Delly's request for help with making signs. As Delly let on, the signs were destined to decorate Peeta's booth at the Equinox Festival. She had gone on talking about how he was down at the train station waiting for the baking ingredients he'd ordered from the Capitol. She had gone on about how she heard it was originally Katniss's idea and she wanted to surprise him with the labels for the pastry samples. She couldn't say no, when at last Delly stated how excited Peeta was at the prospect of tomorrow evening.

So here they were with color markers, while Delly talked up a storm and Katniss only omitted smiles and nods where needed. Whereas some spoke every thought that crossed their minds, others didn't. Katniss easily knew where she fell in that spectrum, yet quiet people always had the loudest minds.

That was part of the reason she was only half listening to Delly.

"Katniss," Delly said get her attention.

"Huh, sorry I didn't hear you," she admitted.

"It's okay, I bet I'm overwhelming you. But I was repeating that I appreciate your help very much," Delly said genuinely, as she finished writing _Cheese Croissants_ on one table card.

Katniss nodded with a smile and glanced at her own ugly logos.

"Sorry, I'm not any good."

"You're just as good as me," Delly compensated.

Katniss ignored the lie, "So how's the house hunting going?"

Delly looked at the list of bread and pastry names she had made when Peeta had rambled on about which he envisioned delighting people he best.

Taking another table card to write on she answered, "I'm still looking, what I have seen is either too big for one person or too small. I just can't believe I can actually afford to live on my own and that's thanks to you too, I now know you convinced Thom to hire me."

"No problem, I mean you wanted it and you were qualified for it. You deserved it," Katniss said in what was the simple truth, but had come across as appraisal.

Delly beamed with a wide smile.

"I just don't get why you're moving out, if you can save money living with Peeta," Katniss asked sincerely.

Katniss did care for Delly's wellbeing in 12, but she felt very conniving asking this when she secretly wanted her out of Peeta's home. In the three weeks that had passed between the day with Peeta at the forest and now, she had found herself wanting to be around him more. He had gone out with her to the same spot a couple more times and had finished the plant book sketches with talent. In measured words, they had also talked some more about their life in between the two years he'd left.

In eight words she could simply sum it up as, it hadn't been easy for either of them. He had explained how Delly came into his life again and in return she had told him how Greasy Sae ended up at her house when the bulldozers came. One day he described to her the worst episode he suffered in the Capitol hospital and in return she described to him of the time she broke all the mirrors in the house. Their initially retained friendship was slowly unraveling and she didn't know where it was heading. All she knew was that when she thought of the idea of making a book, sort of like the plant book, except with memoirs of their deceased ones, she thought of him. She wanted to create it with him, because in the end he was the only one who shared her same losses and the only one could ever understand.

She hadn't brought it up yet, and part of it was because she just wanted it to be just them two. No Delly or Haymitch around.

When she really looked at Delly not just spaced out in her direction, she realized she had missed half her answer.

"… it's better that way. I also think when we both start dating, it'd be weird."

Katniss's eyes went wide, "You want to date Peeta?"

Delly look mortified, "No! No, that's a disturbing thought. I think I can speak for both Peeta and me, when I say we couldn't ever see each other that way. No, I meant if I start dating someone else and bring him around here, it'd be weird."

"Oh," Katniss understood feeling stupid.

Katniss tried to not be as emotionally oblivious as she had been in the past. However, she still hesitated to voice her feelings or not. She could admit to herself she didn't begrudge Peeta for having left and that she liked having him back in her life. They finally had the chance to be good friends without external forces pushing them together, or apart. She liked that they could take as long as needed, to be something more or not. She wouldn't voice it, but that is why she felt relief at Delly's answer.

"I think it would be weird when we start dating. I don't want him scaring of my guy if I brought him around or me being protective of him when has a girlfriend," Delly added.

Katniss wondered, "Would you? I mean, would you be protective? …like have you ever had to be?"

Delly's hands stilled and her face expression turned thoughtful.

"To be honest, after knowing what happened to him, well both of you, yeah I am protective of him. I've known Peeta all my life and he's like a brother, so I care for him about as much as my real brother."

Katniss simpered at her with esteem. She respected that answer in all its sense.

"And you asked whether I have ever had to be protective?" Delly asked making sure that was the other part Katniss questioned.

"Yeah," Katniss uttered anticipating her answer.

"I kind of did the last month in the Capitol before we came here. There was a nurse in Dr. Aurelius's staff," Delly began.

"What happened," Katniss probed trying to sound indifferent.

Delly pouted, "She was a flirt when she shouldn't have been. I started accompanying Peeta to his appointments after he asked me to and after I found out she had kissed him."

"Oh," Katniss said feeling her stomach turn over.

"Nothing more came of it and we came back here soon after," Delly acclaimed.

"Although, I'm glad he didn't return the interest," she added soon after with a smirk.

"Why is that?"

Delly smiled nervously, "Because Katniss… Okay, don't take this the wrong way, but I have always kind of rooted for the two of you."

There was an answer Katniss didn't expect. She didn't know how to respond, so she reached for another table card instead, avoiding eye contact with Delly.

The blonde got the hint and changed conversation topics, inquiring what the Equinox Festival was like. Katniss told her she hadn't attended last year and admitted she probably wouldn't go to this year either. Delly tried to convince her while they finished the signs, but by the time she left home there was no definite answer.

* * *

Katniss went home and finished a long list of house chores since Haymitch was no help. When the afternoon turned evening, she began browsing through the ice box for dinner options. She didn't get a chance to make a decision because someone knocked on her door. Peeta held up a tin foil wrapped plate and pointed at it through the window by the front door.

"Delly told me," he informed her as soon as she opened the door.

She already knew he was referring to her chicken scratch table cards for his booth tomorrow.

"You didn't have to," she frowned as she took the plate offered to her.

"You didn't either," he rebutted.

Katniss lifted the tin foil to peer at what was under, "I thought friends could do nice things for each other, without expecting anything in return."

Peeta broadly smiled, "Note taken, but until next time-"

"Peeta," she scowled when the treat revealed was a group of cheese buns.

She's not sure why it bothered her, even if her cravings disagreed. She concluded, it was because of the attentive gesture for a service she didn't even want to give initially.

Delly deserved the cheese buns, it had been her idea.

"What about Delly?"

"She already ate four, so don't be stubborn and accept them."

"It's just a thank you," Peeta validated.

Katniss respired, "Alright, but only if you have some with me."

Peeta smirked, "Okay."

"Come in," she said waving him in while she went off to find dishware.

Peeta closed the door behind him, "Where's Haymitch?"

"Sleeping in his room," Katniss bellowed over her shoulder.

Peeta followed her and sat around the kitchen table.

Katniss gathered plates and butter knives. She also took mugs from a cupboard for the kettle of tea she had on the stove.

She set them around the table alongside the cheese buns.

She also went to the ice box to retrieve some butter.

"It's his clockwork. Slumber in the in the day, drink at night, eat somewhere in between," she said finally, slumping into a chair near Peeta.

Peeta grimaced while buttering his cheese bun with a knife, "He's like a- like a- what's a nocturnal animal?"

Katniss thought of the different animals she had seen on the hunger games across her life, thus far.

"I don't know how nocturnal a hyena is, but that's the animal that comes to mind where Haymitch is involved," Katniss said pouring and handing him a mug of tea.

Peeta chuckled, "Why is that?"

"All of his complaining sounds like their manic whining to my ears," Katniss joked reaching for a cheese bun.

"Leave it to you to develop a crude sense of humor," Peeta laughed loudly.

Katniss smiled in reflection.

"I have to, to live around Haymitch at least."

Haymitch in a demented way had become one of her few loved ones, but that didn't mean she couldn't flaunt his faults. He never wavered to tell her hers, so she didn't feel too much guilt making fun of him.

She still changed the conversation as she lathered her cheese bun with butter.

"So Delly said you were waiting at the station for baking supplies?"

Peeta sipped from his warm beverage and answered, "Yeah, I got them all. The delay came in finding a way to bring them all home."

After a mouthful, she asked, "So how did you do it?"

"I paid the butcher to lent me his wheel barrow," he said before biting into his ailment.

Katniss finished her cheese bun before commenting. It had been too long since she had this delicacy of happiness.

As she moved for seconds, she asked, "Won't he need it, to carry his meat to the festival tomorrow?"

"Nah, he lives right by the square, at least that's what he said," Peeta remarked finishing his cheesebun.

Katniss scoffed, "He probably just wanted your victor money."

"Maybe, but speaking about the festival, Delly said you weren't going," he said confused as he brought the mug to his lips again.

Katniss shrugged, "I am going."

"I mean going and staying, dropping off clean game at Sae's booth doesn't really count," Peeta stated rolling his eyes.

Delly had passed on part of their earlier conversation to him. He wanted her to go, but he didn't want to sound desperate for her presence.

"Oh, well in that case, yeah I'm not going," Katniss articulated before drinking from her mug.

Peeta raised an eyebrow, "Why?"

Katniss thought about a good reason, a really good reason he couldn't challenge her on. She came up empty. The year before had been too soon for her no matter how much trifling progress she had made. This year was twice as much progress, but still it was no secret she had never been a social butterfly. In fact, hadn't Haymitch defined her as having the charm of a dead slug?

She sighed, "I don't really have a good excuse."

"Exactly," Peeta said taking a bite from another cheese bun.

"Yeah, but there's not really good reason to go either," Katniss thought out loud.

Peeta swallowed his mouthful, "What about coming to visit my booth?"

Katniss didn't want to say the wrong thing, so she shrugged in acquiescence, "I'll think about it."

"Okay that works," Peeta grinned with victory.

"Shut up," she snapped at his expression without any real conviction.

Peeta raised an eyebrow with a smug smile and threw a piece of cheese bun at her.

She dodged and goaded, "Hey, friends don't do that!"

They laughed and stilled. She bit her lip and he stared.

In their own fleeting thoughts they both knew "just friends" wasn't going to work at some point.

Friends didn't look at each other like that.

**AN: idk, you tell me?**

**And thank you to those who followed, favorited, and reviewed. You're awesome.**


	7. Chapter 7

Katniss dragged her own body weight along with the two packed game bags she carried on each shoulder. It was just around 2 pm in the afternoon and she was already exhausted. She had woken up at the dawning twilight and trekked out to the woods. She exerted herself in getting the best game for Greasy Sae's food stall at the celebration today. She had ensnared a few rabbits and trapped a large turkey. She had shot down some plump squirrels and wild geese. She had hauled it all home and cleaned it for the old woman's sake, since she would have no time to do it.

As she walked on the outlying streets of the town square, she saw merchants setting up tables under small tents. She crossed through the center of the town, where she saw others decorating lamp posts with bulky ribbon and setting up the large banner that announced the Equinox Festival. She saw men setting up a makeshift stage for where she knew fiddlers would play their music. She sighed trying to dash to the block Greasy Saw was setting up in, hurrying to get the weight of the meat off her arms.

She was just rounding the corner when someone called after her, "Everdeen!"

Katniss turned around to find her friend approaching her, she smiled.

"Thom."

She hadn't seen him in a while, he worked long hours in the weekdays and on weekends she had taken to hanging out with Peeta, when she wasn't in the woods.

"I thought you weren't coming to this," he said surprised, even though it was still too early.

The festival had no official hour for attending, but most people arrived when the sun was just setting.

"I wasn't," she answered.

He raised an eyebrow, "Then?"

She didn't want to reveal that Peeta had changed her mind, so she lifted a game bag.

"I'm here to hand this over, but I'll see about coming back later," she responded.

Thom nodded.

He questioned, "Are you dropping that off with Sae?"

"Yeah," she uttered wanting to keep walking, before the weight of it pulled her down.

"Here, I'll help you," Thom extended a hand noticing her struggle.

"I can do it," she scorned.

Thom ignored her with a laugh and took a game bag from her.

"Alright," she scowled when he motioned for her to hand him the second one.

Thom weighed the second one in his hand, "How many of these were from the snares?"

Katniss fell in step beside him, frowning at how effortlessly he carried the weight, "About five."

Thom smirked, "Any of mine?"

Katniss beamed, "All of them."

"I figured," he retorted in playful disapproval.

Thom left snares out and if he had the chance at the end of the day, he'd check to see if there was any catch. He didn't need to hunt, he's job on the town council paid more than enough to sustain his living. It was simply that he had a preference for fresh meat and Katniss respected that. They hunted on the weekends together, well not so much lately. Nonetheless, since some entrapped carcasses spoiled in a day or other scavenging animals would eat them, Katniss tended use Thom's snares as her own. They were friends, so he didn't mind and she wasn't greedy. She would drop off game at his door too. She would even clean it and hand it over, enveloped nicely in supple wrappings.

"I saw your boyfriend setting up shop," Thom said bringing her out of her thoughts.

She glowered, "He's not my boyfriend."

Whatever, was between her and Peeta she didn't like to talk about with anyone. She changed conversations topics, when Delly implied something. She threw things at Haymitch, when he made snide comments about star-crossed lovers. She played with Greasy Sae's granddaughter, when the woman wanted to interrogate her about Peeta. As for her only other friend, this was what she did.

She acted indifferently.

"Not what I heard," Thom informed her with a smug smile.

She narrowed her eyes, "What's do you mean?"

"Heard you were heading off into the woods together," he said cautiously.

Katniss sighed with resigned frustration, "I can't believe people still give a damn about my life."

Thom shrugged but added, "Look, I know you guys have a history together and it's none of my business. I just care about you… like a bratty little sister. I remember him back in 13 and… just be careful, alright?"

Katniss's face expression changed, "Don't worry okay. He's… himself again."

She gave him a side eye, "And I care about you too… dad."

Thom grimaced, "Hey, I'm not that old, besides I thought Haymitch was more like your dad in that dysfunctional family of yours."

Katniss laughed, "No. No. Haymitch's like my gruffy, ill mannered, and overgrown child."

Thom looked thoughtful for a second, "Bet he wasn't breastfed."

Katniss's eye went wide, "Eeew, what?"

"As a child, it would explain why he's so attached to the bottle now."

Katniss felt relief, having thought disgustingly for a second. She didn't correct him on the actual reasons Haymitch was attached to the bottle. They were the same reasons he slept in the day, where they were a little less haunting.

They dropped off the game bags with Sae, who exalted in appraisal when she inspected the meat. She would make good money tonight. Although, the district was had mostly recovered and there was a deeper sense of community than there had ever been, business was still business. The entertainment and the merriment would be free, but food and merchandise weren't. Since people had quality jobs with money or goods to trade now, they didn't seem to mind too much.

Katniss and Thom left Greasy Sae with the promise to come in the evening for a hot free meal, they were family after all.

"I think I'm going to shower for hours," Katniss said in disgust as she took in sight of her clothes and arms.

"I have stuff to do too, before I can have any fun around here. I have to go finish up some paper work before tomorrow," Thom grieved as they walked through town together.

When they come within reach of the corner where they had to separate he said, "I'll tell you what, I'll pass by your house and we can come together."

Katniss nodded.

"How's 6ish?"

"That works," he said at the corner.

"Alright I'll see you," she waved.

"Wear something pretty," he yelled teasingly from a distance.

"You too," Katniss hollered back.

* * *

Katniss did stay in the shower longer than usual, but it was still far too early to get ready for 6 pm. She parted her medium length hair down the middle and plaited the halves in two braids. Some hairs stuck out, still too short in stretch, but she wasn't planning on wearing her hair like this, that's just how she slept in it. When she'd wake up in the mornings, she brushed it out and wore it down with the natural wavy tresses the braids formed. When she was in the woods, she'd pull it away into a low bun. She wasn't very creative with hairstyles, so she wasn't going to go through the hassle. She braided it now, so that she could take a nap and have something to work with when she woke up.

She roused around three hours later with little time to spare. She debated in her wardrobe until she settled for a pale pink dress that used to be her mother's, it was eerily similar to the infamous blue one from her reaping. She wondered off for a moment in memories, but shook them off. Life could only be analyzed backwards, but daily she had to fight the _'what if's. _They were pointless because this is the life she had now and it could only be lived forward, not backward. There was no purpose to get dejected in inane thoughts of the past and so she moved to the bathroom. She fixed her hair and sprayed some holding spray. She even applied a bit of make up to elongate her eyelashes and rosy her cheeks. It was a festive occasion, why not try to look a bit more cleaned up, for once.

She pulled on some suede, gray flats and walked out to the porch to wait for Thom. She sat on the stairs and pondered where Haymitch was. She had seen him on the couch when she got home, but vanished when she had sauntered down the stairs hours later. She put her elbows on her knees and her chin on her hands. It was 6:20 in the evening, and there was still no sign of Thom.

A few minutes later, she saw someone rushing through Victor Village's gates, but it wasn't her dark-haired friend.

Peeta almost didn't notice her in his haste, carrying a large empty burlap sack with him.

She called after him, "Peeta!"

Peeta almost tripped on his own feet in surprise. When he recovered he came back in her direction and at the sight of her, his priorities were forgotten.

"You're wearing pink," he said fascinated.

"Probably will be dirty brown by the time I come home," she joked.

"It looks nice on you," he commended.

She didn't know how to accept compliments, so instead she asked, "What are you doing here?"

He should be in the festival, selling his taste bud inducing pastries.

Peeta promptly explained, "I came to get the extras I made this afternoon."

She was confused, "What?"

He beamed, "They sold out Katniss!"

She smiled genuinely, "That's great."

He remembered his urgency now, "I left Delly on the last rounds, so I have to hurry. I saw Haymitch at the bar stall, he wasted no time. Are you just leaving?"

"Soon," she hoped.

He looked her over approvingly, "Do you want to come with me?"

"I'm waiting for Thom," she answered trying not to flush under his gaze.

Something changed in his expression, "Oh."

She began, "I'm just-"

"Sorry, I should get going," he small smiled before turning and walking briskly toward his house.

She was stunned for a moment, but then bellowed after him, "Good luck."

He didn't reply.

* * *

Thom's justification was simple enough, he had fallen asleep. Katniss didn't accept his apologizing, there was no need. She knew he worked hard and since both of them awoke with the appetite of hungry boars, the first stop had been at Greasy Sae's.

Haymitch had joined them there too at some point and showed off his new liquor purchases. As they ate and clowned around Katniss realized she was really content in that moment, with the few people who had come to mean so much to her. It was turning out to be a good night, until Haymitch shared a few shots with Thom. Sae dismissed them all immediately for the sake of her steady stream of customers. She even scolded Katniss in the process for not being more candid about the situation.

The festival was starting to grow on Katniss, the longer she wandered in it. In one corner, she could make out young children tittering near game booths, where they won toys or candy depending on their aim. She could hear the backdrop of fiddle music near the center of the town square where the stage had been placed and the drone-like chatter of people lost in conversations. She was enthralled by the different sources invading her senses, and she realized for the first time maybe it had all been worth it. The giggling children would never have to fear being reaped again and adults finally had the luxury of choosing food on something other than sustenance. She smiled and briefly wondered if Peeta might be thinking the same.

"I'm bloated," Thom proclaimed as they moved through the commemoration.

"No one forced you to eat two bowls," Katniss retorted back as she kept an arm crossed through his to keep him up right while walking through moving bodies.

Thom could act as tough as he wanted, but he couldn't hold his liquor. He was verging past tipsy and Katniss had to provide some support to keep him from stumbling.

"Yeah, but she didn't have to fill them to the rim," Thom protested lamely.

"She felt obliged since they were your catches," Katniss answered.

"Hmm, the good they do me. I don't have enough time to be out there," he lamented.

Katniss smirked, "Good thing I can, more to scavenge off."

Thom gave her a side glance, "More like steal, but whatever."

She stifled a snort as they walked linked together to the unintended, but by majority coincidence, sweets and confections street.

"Hey," Thom said narrowing his eyes at one booth in the distance

"What," she answered distracted as she searched for Peeta's stand.

"Have you ever tried some shaved ice?"

"No," she responded trying to remember if she had.

"Come on."

Thom dragged her along clumsily, until she got her stride and supported their combined weight better.

She noticed the pair of blondes almost immediately. It's as if her gaze rippled through the air and tugged on one of Delly's wavy curls, because she soon turned in the direction of Katniss and Thom. She squinted her eyes and when realization crossed her face, she lifted up her hand to wave. Katniss gestured back as best she could with one free hand. She saw Delly elbow Peeta who was organizing something on their table and when he saw the pair of them, he didn't greet them as she expected.

It dawned on Katniss that maybe it bothered him, her holding on to Thom's arm. She had explained their friendship to him though, so it couldn't be that. She assumed the business of the second rounds of bread probably wasn't selling so well.

She turned her eyes away from them and looked back at Thom, who was oblivious to her ordeal.

He was distracted looking at flavors and combinations of shaved ice on the booth's posters.

"I thought you were bloated," she verbalized.

Thom raised an eyebrow, "I could make room."

Katniss sighed, predicting a retching Thom hours from now, with a stomach crammed of rabbit stew, whiskey, and saccharine ice.

Thom moved to make his choosing, but only after he asked, "So you want one or not?"

She denied the offer and told him she'd be at Peeta's stall.

"Hi," she said when she drew near the table of smelling wonders.

"Hey," Peeta answered looking over at her.

The cold countenance on his face kept her from speaking, until Delly finished with the a customer.

She on the other hand, received her with a smile and warmth.

"Katniss! You look lovely."

Katniss smiled, "You too Delly."

She glanced at Peeta, "So how's the round of seconds going?"

Peeta fixed some table cards, so Delly answered for them both.

"They're going great. You should have seen the people. The ones who knew Peeta's family were so kind and they talked about how much they missed the famous Mellark bread."

"That's great," Katniss simpered.

Peeta looked up from his organizing, "So where's Thom?"

Katniss turned around expecting to find the sight of him where she had left him, only there were other people there. No Thom between or among them, so she turned around and said as much.

"I don't know, he promised me some shaved ice and disappeared. He's probably eating his and mine."

Delly' eyes lit up with awe, "There's a stand of shaved ice?"

"Yeah it's over there," Katniss said pointing the direction she came from.

Delly reached for her purse, "I'll be right back then."

Katniss moved around the table to be near Peeta.

She sat on the stool Delly had vacated, "So did you make it back here in time?"

"Yeah," Peeta answered in one word from his own stool.

"I saw Haymitch, you were right. He got his hands on four new bottles of whiskey,"

"I bet," Peeta said adjusting a row of croissants that didn't need fixing.

"I guess I have the new task of emptying them half out and filling them with water," Katniss joked, although it was what she always did.

Haymitch hadn't caught on to her tricks yet, only muttering about how the new liquor maker could learned a thing or two from the deceased Ripper.

"Good idea," Peeta said with indifference.

Why was he acting like this?

Katniss deliberated, "Are you mad at me or something?"

Peeta returned her contemplation now, "Why would I be mad?"

"I don't know you tell me," she said without raising her voice.

Peeta motioned in the direction of the shaved ice stand, "Shouldn't you go find Thom?"

There it was, he was jealous.

Katniss didn't know how she felt about that on either end.

"We're just friends Peeta," she reassured.

"Hmm, yeah I know," Peeta said sarcastically.

Katniss's temper was starting to rise under her skin, "Do you?"

"Yeah, but your definition of friends entails a lot of things," he said without pause.

She felt defensive now, "What is that supposed to mean?"

He just shrugged, not revealing his real thoughts.

It was almost three months to date since Peeta had come back to 12. She had growing affection for him, but she also held Thom with regard. He gave her a new type friendship, where he wasn't secretly in love with her or they had to get along for the sake of Capitol television. He was her friend because they had common interests and transparent liking for one another as individuals, nothing less or more. So yes, she was protective it, even if it bothered Peeta.

Katniss exhaled and collectedly clarified, "I've told you this past year Thom was one of the few people who were there for me. He's as much of my friend as you were… are. I don't act like this toward Delly, so I don't get why you're acting like this with him."

Peeta took a deep breath, "You don't get it, do you?"

She didn't, "What?"

"I've tried to rationalize it, but there's no fighting it. They may or may not make sense, but they're there," Peeta rambled on more to himself, than her.

"I'm not understanding," Katniss said disclosing her fustration.

She stood up when he kept mute longer than was fitting. She would let him clear his mind on his own.

He stood up when she made move to leave.

"My feelings for you, Katniss."

She stared at him in complete silence.

He moved closer, mere inches apart, his eyes never drifting away from hers, "I know what you're going to say, that it's not possible after everything. But it is what it is."

He waited for a reply, but when she opened her mouth, no words were produced.

So he continued, "And yes I am mad, not at you, but at myself. Seeing you with Thom makes me feel the exact same way seeing you with Gale did four years ago, and it all makes me feel like a fool."

She froze. She didn't know what to say, what to do, how to breathe.

"So that's the truth Katniss. I can't you be your friend, when I all I want to do is kiss you," he said as his eyes lingered down to her lips.

He made no action to lean in, so she just gazed as his eyes came back to stare in hers.

"I- I-"she stammered.

"I know it's too much and I-" he never finished.

On impulse she kissed him, because she wouldn't let him take back any of it.

She initially had just pressed her lips softly to his, eyes closed. She was just pulling away when he reacted, pressing her against him with his hands on her waist. His kiss was more insistent and Katniss responded to it, letting their mouths find a semblance of familiarity.

She tried to pull back, to think, to breathe, but his lips just followed hers. She caved and her hands fisted in his shirt. They kissed until he bit her bottom lip and she needed air. He rested his forehead on hers.

They stayed seconds too long like that, eyes closed and pressed together.

"Peeta," she exhaled against him.

The feeling of being watched, pulled her out of the bliss.

She looked over Peeta's shoulder to see Delly standing in shock, with a cup of shaved ice melting in her hand.

"I'm sorry," Delly uttered for ruining or saving the moment. She didn't know.

She retreated to let them be alone.

"No, Delly stay! I have to go- I have to- go," Katniss said pulling away from Peeta, not daring to look him in the eyes.

She walked away briskly, never turning back. When she was sure she was out of their sight, she practically ran home.


	8. Chapter 8

He can't help feel like an idiot, for many reasons. He can't help the sinking feeling of having messed it all up. His dead mother would have probably agreed, calling him a fool for tripping on what was behind him. But she would be wrong because Katniss wasn't behind him, she had been right in front of him, kissing him. All the time that had passed and it was like they never left their old routine. He couldn't keep his mouth shut and laid it all out in the open. He was still the same bread boy desperate for her affection and she, well she still didn't know how to return it. Yet, she still did things that confused them both like kissing him and before he processed what it meant, she ran away. It was behavior too accustomed to the past and he didn't know how to act on it.

He was an idiot because he realized how thoughtless he had been. He had basically thrown his feelings at her and hadn't even considered if she was ready to hear them. He caught her off guard and she had reacted on a whim.

A week after the festival they were knowingly playing hide and seek with each other. He didn't know if he was supposed to chase after her or give her space. He decided on the latter, letting her make the choice.

Now on this Sunday, he was confident he was being more tiresome than helpful to Delly. While he had been busy sulking on his situation, Delly had found her ideal housing. It was fifteen minutes away from the Justice Building and it was in one of the townhouse complexes the governments had built after the war. It had a combined kitchen and living room, with two bedrooms and a bathroom directly above. It was perfect for a lone person to rent and to Delly's convenience it already came furnished.

"…and if he visits the guest room will be for him. He'll have his own space to stay as long as he wants. I just can't believe it's finally happening. I used to think the only way I was going to leave home was getting married."

Peeta gave Delly a small smile as his half listened to her excitement. She was organizing office paperwork into files on the kitchen table, while he unpacked some of her new cooking appliances from District 3 on the counter.

"I didn't know what I was going to do when I got older, well before the games. As the last brother I never had a chance of inheriting the bakery and it's not like I would have been able to open my own," he related back, setting up the coffee maker.

"I didn't want to work in the shoe shop forever," Delly lamented.

"I guess even after everything, a few things did work out for the best," Peeta shrugged.

Delly looked in his direction, hesitating, but finally admitting, "Peeta, I know you don't want to talk about Katniss, but it's obvious how much it's bothering you."

Peeta sighed inwardly, this was going to be another one of her futile attempts throughout the week. She was like his annoying little sister wanting to know what happened and mostly trying to enlighten him with some new angle of clarity.

"It isn't," he lied unconvincingly.

"Peeta don't insult my intelligence," Delly answered seemingly.

Peeta raised an eyebrow and smirked at what was probably some of Katniss's cynicism having rubbed off on Delly.

"It does, but you know that subject is out of conversation options," Peeta informed her apologetically.

Even if Delly was family to him, where his love relationship with Katniss or lack of was involved, those matters were sequestered.

Delly turned her back to him, continuing with her task, "Fine, but now I'm not telling you what she said."

Peeta's eyes widen, "When did you see her?"

Delly worked long hours in the weekdays and he had been by her side all day, packing up the remainder of her belongings that they had been busy bringing over yesterday.

Delly easily relented, "This morning when you were showering."

He came around the counter and sat across from her at the table.

"I went to say goodbye, well to being her neighbor," Delly responded to his questioning gaze.

Peeta adjusted a stack of manila folders, "What did she say?"

"She didn't say much. I made most of the talking," Delly sympathized.

When Peeta didn't speak, she continued, "I told her I was leaving today and where she could find me if she needed anything. I told her she was more than welcomed to come visit me, at any time on the weekends. I thanked her for being a great neighbor and to keep an eye on you for me."

"You told her all that?"

"I know I can be overwhelming for her reserved nature, but she surprised me. She said I didn't even need to ask about watching out for you and she said she was going to miss me. I don't know if that last part is actually true, but she even gave me a hug wishing me good luck," Delly smiled.

Peeta didn't know what to answer to that, so he only nodded.

"You want me to make some lunch," he asked instead.

* * *

It wasn't until Peeta was home alone, that he realized how much he would miss the cheerful blonde. They would still see each other on the weekends of course, but it wouldn't be the same, and without her vibrant banter he found himself lost in his own head. He didn't miss this deafening silence he had known in the Capitol's psychiatric ward in the beginning of his arrival there.

He resolved to spend his evening finishing up the last draft of the bakery's blueprints for the contractor. Everything was ready to go as soon as he turned it in and the hired man made the final calculations needed to oversee the construction. Peeta could barely contain the exhilaration he felt when imagined the Mellark's Bakery sign going up and the door chimes announcing his customers.

He smiled at the visualization and shaking off his musings, continued making modifications to the bakery's back room. But when he started to premeditate what to make for his solitaire dinner, there was an abhorrent knocking on his front door.

Peeta opened the door to find an agitated Haymitch, carrying a pile of his own dishware that had accumulated at the man's home since his return. He spotted the dish that he had transported gratitude and cheese buns on for Katniss, at the bottom of the stack.

Haymitch defiantly shoved the mound toward Peeta's arms and when Peeta carried it to the counter, the old man invited himself in.

Haymitch slammed the door shut behind him, but at the force it hinged back off the frame, leaving a small crack open.

Haymitch followed Peeta, "So what the hell did you do now?!"

Peeta deposited the heap of dishes and moved back to his seat around the table, "Well, hello to you too."

Haymitch slumped into a chair across from him, voice still raised, "So what was it?!"

Peeta easily irritated at the hostility, "I didn't do anything!"

Haymitch watched him intently for seconds and Peeta mirrored him with equal tension.

Finally the old man grunted, "Yeah, right. The kid sent me, ME! … like if I'm some damn errand boy."

Peeta motioned toward the front door, "Okay, thank you… Goodbye."

Haymitch shook his head, "Oh, no you don't."

He pointed an accusing finger at Peeta, "I didn't walk all the way over here to leave without answers."

Peeta slammed down the pencil he had previously picked up, "Damn it Haymitch! What do you want?!"

Haymitch shoot him a knowing smirk and crossed his arms, "I want an explanation why I haven't seen your pretty little face around my house and why that kid has a permanent scowl on hers."

Peeta exhaled tiredly, before replying, "I told her I had feelings for her."

Haymitch who slacked back on his chair, simply shrugged, "That's nothing new."

"She kissed me," Peeta countered.

Haymitch still wasn't impressed, "And?"

Peeta annoyed, voiced his hurt, "She ran out on me."

Haymitch rubbed a hand over his face, slurring, "I thought you two were supposed to be older now… wiser."

"Yeah, well old habits die hard," Peeta retorted.

Haymitch looked directly at him, "They better, I'm not going to try to play peacemaker this time around."

Peeta didn't relent on his frustration, "No one is asking you too!"

Haymitch snorted and slowly preached, "See you'd think that, but considering you two alternate from clawing at each other like wild dogs to crawling towards one another like morphlings looking for a fix…" and for lack of a better word finished, "I'm concerned."

Peeta thought about that comment for a second and realized Haymitch was the most observant drunk in history. There was so much truth to it. Hadn't they acted like enemies when he allied himself with the Careers, only to hopelessly hold on to each other in the cave later? Hadn't it been the same with the love disillusionment after they won, only to seek comfort from each other at night during the victory tour? Hadn't he done the actual snarling and clawing at her when he was rescued by District 13 from his captors? And hadn't she crawled onto his lap for fortitude later during the Capitol assault? Their history was a mess and he didn't want to give Haymitch the satisfaction of being right.

So he scoffed with indifference instead, "Oh and why are we so lucky?"

Haymitch dropped all traces of mockery when he answered, "Because that girl has spent two years trying to move forward and it hasn't been easy. I don't want you coming here to screw up the little sanity she has patched back together."

Peeta stared at him coldly, "Well, it wasn't easy for me either."

A look of guilt passed over Haymitch and he finally softened, "I know, I know, all I'm asking you is to think before you act damn it."

Peeta narrowed his eyes, "Did you tell her that?"

Haymitch ignored his defensive remark and probed, "Has she told you the reason she lives with me?"

Peeta shook his head.

"Sae found a trail of dried blood leading from her bedroom carpet to her bathroom tiles one morning. The poor kid had decided to play butcher with her own wrists… and that was already after a long list of disturbing findings for the old woman. That's why I'm telling you."

Peeta sighed with remorse, "I didn't know."

Haymitch pushed himself out his chair, "I'm sure there's a lot both you don't."

He stood with both fists on the table when he added, "Just take it slow huh."

Peeta could only nod.

Haymitch gave him one last look, before retreating toward his exit.

When he had his hand on the door knob, he added a final note, "Oh and one more thing."

Peeta stared at him, "Yeah?"

Haymitch pulled the door wider, "Make sure that once you are back to scrambling toward one another, that you leave me the fuck alone."

He slammed the door shut, leaving Peeta to drown in his thoughts.

* * *

As his first dinner of living alone in 12, he ate a bowl of cereal, like the adult he's not. He has experienced a lifetime of humanity's horrors at 20 years old, but by some debauched notion he's still feels like a child. He can't explain it, but it probably has to do with rediscovering life after what the Capitol stole from him. He doesn't fret over it, some people are old at 20 and some are young at 80. Isn't time a just concept humans created anyway? And he knows how fragile any system humans create can be, just ask the dead Coriolanus Snow.

At that morbid thought, he began to feel suffocated in his own home.

He decided to take a walk around town, even if the hour was approaching late night.

He stepped out to his porch, but didn't get far. There sitting on his steps was the girl constantly on the back of his mind.

"Katniss," he uttered in astonishment.

She turned her head and smiled tiredly, "Hey."

He approached her like you would an aggrieved animal, close enough to inspect the wounds, but far enough to not make it feel cornered.

He sat next to her on the steps, leaving a small gap in between, "How long have you been out here?"

She shrugged, "Half an hour, maybe."

He wondered, "Where you ever going to knock?"

She nodded slightly and professed, "I just had to clear my thoughts."

He wasn't sure what to make from that declaration, so he stared up at the few stars lighting the sky.

It appeared to be the right choice because she continued, "I was making dinner when I noticed all your plates in the cupboard. I panicked thinking you would come asking for them, before I was ready to face you, so I sent Haymitch."

"Haymitch the goody home maker huh," he joked, still not turning back to her.

"I ran after him, seconds too late. I realized it could make things worse… at the implication. He was already inside your house by the time I got to your door," she finished.

The memory of Haymitch slamming the door formed in his head, then it zoomed in on a smaller detail.

The door had feebly bounced back, not closing all the way, leaving a small crack to…

He regarded Katniss with surprise, "You heard our conversation?"

"I'm sorry, I eavesdropped," Katniss replied delicately.

Peeta smirked, "No, you're not."

The corners of her lips lifted slightly.

He speculated, "How much did you hear?"

"Enough… took everything in me to act indifferent when he got home. I wanted to punch him in the eye… especially the part about- he- that wasn't his story to tell," she stammered, not once returning his stare.

Peeta didn't want to stay the wrong thing, now that she seemed willing to talk.

He just agreed, "No, it wasn't."

She finally turned to him, looking him in the eyes, "I bet you think I'm crazy."

Peeta shook his head.

"I don't think you are."

Her eyebrows furrowed, "You don't?"

"No, I _know_ you're crazy."

She went silent, until he added, "But that never dissuaded me before, did it?"

He watched her and she faltered for a moment. At the impression that she had made up her mind, she stood up. When he expected to see her go, she went and did something that surprised him more.

She straddled his lap on the stairs, not in a sensual way, but as a mean to communicate something her mouth wasn't ready to.

His arms lay limp at his side, while hers rested in between their chests. She was waiting for him to make the next move, to accept her unspoken apology. He wanted to tell her that this wasn't right, they should talk, just talk. But his will power never followed through when it came to her, did it?

He pitched his arms forward, around hers, and at the gesture she rested her head on his shoulder. They both breathed deeply and his fingers danced caringly up and down her spine. It was almost pathetic how easily he fell apart to her touch.

They stayed like that for about a minute, before she mumbled, "I thought I would act different when it happened."

He smiled sadly, "You were expecting it?"

He felt her body's vibrations when she nodded, "Yes, but some time down the road. It just happened too fast, too soon."

He lifted her chin to look her in the eyes, "I'm sorry."

She shook her head on his cupping hand, "Don't be."

She inadvertently pushed his hands off her, when she held his own face in her hands.

"Peeta… I want this, whatever this is."

He froze, just staring, exactly like she had when he made his own love speech a week ago.

"I'm certain of that, like I'm certain of my growing feelings for you."

Her thumbs stroke his cheeks, "I'm just scared, okay. But… But as long as you stay with me, I think I could learn not to be."

That statement meant more to him than any acquittal of love she had ever made. It was a testament of her true feelings and she trusted him with her vulnerability. She was letting him in and like he had told Delly earlier, even after everything maybe some things did work out for the best.

He couldn't contain the need to show her his appreciation and his corresponding affection. While her hands held his face, his reeled her body to his, wanting closeness, and seeking her lips. His kiss was less insistent than last week, he didn't want to scare her off again.

His lips brushed against hers gently and she responded. It lasted seconds, before hers pulled away and this time his knew better than to shadow after them.

He cupped her face, when she rested her hands on his shoulders.

"You don't have to be scared. We can take this as slow as you need it to be. Okay?"

She nodded and smiled in his hands.

She gazed back intently and then suddenly she threw her arms around him, pulling him in a tight embrace.

"I missed you," she breathed into the side of his neck.

He didn't know if she was referring to this week, to the two years he was gone, or worse since the moment in the Quarter Quell under the lightening tree where they promised to meet at midnight and they never did.

He didn't want to think about that, they were here now.

He cradled her back with the only truth he knew, after surviving the first games, "I missed you too."

They stayed like that for a minute, lingering in each other's arms, guess Haymitch had been right all along.

He wondered, "Do you have to go home?"

A light bulb appeared to light over Katniss, she moved off his lap and retrieved a forgotten book near the space she had sat initially.

"No, but I have a project I want your help in," she said with that dimpled smile he had unwittingly missed.

She stood up, holding the bulky book in one arm, and offering to pull him up with the other.

He smiled and accepted the extended hand.

He asked once he stood on his feet, "So what is it?"

Katniss pointed to his front door, "Can I go in?"

He laughed at her incredulously, "Like you really need to ask?"

She beamed, but then a recall thought dampened his mood and he frowned.

"What is it?"

He inquired, "Will Haymitch worry if you stay out too late?

She laughed, "It's not like I'm sleeping over and besides…"

"What?"

She shrugged, "He already knew where I was heading when I left."

He smiled and pulled her to him, placing a kiss on her forehead like he had longed to do weeks ago.

She smiled wider and grabbed his hand, leading him inside, "Come on."

**AN: So? **

**Let me know your thoughts and thank you to those who have.**


	9. Chapter 9

**It's been two months I know… I have valid reasons between school and personal problems. I couldn't sleep last night and this was my salvation. Hope people read and review. I'll try to write more. Sorry for typos, bad grammar, blah blah… thank you. :):**

She couldn't sleep. It was one of those nights in which familiar fears and doubts resurfaced from her unconscious. They came without provocation and she was accustomed to over thinking when they did. She felt like screaming her frustrations, instead she resorted to repeating facts in her head.

She was Katniss Everdeen. She was 20 years old. She should have been dead long ago, but she was still breathing. She was alive in a world without Prim. She lived in District 12, in Haymitch's house. She didn't know if she had really forgiven her mother, but she responded to every one of her letters. She enjoyed Greasy Sae's rabbit stew the most from the old woman's limited menu. She occasionally gave Thom the game she scavenged off his own snares. She had to accept Delly's tea invitation eventually. Peeta came back to her against all the odds.

This present wasn't what she had imagined when they dumped her here after the war. It wasn't the isolated and miserable future she had expected to live. It was a better world, but why couldn't her lurking worries stay away. She repeated facts.

It was a better world now. The monsters were just in her head. She could live with that because at least they weren't under her bed anymore... or in the Capitol waiting for her.

She would be okay. She and Peeta would be okay.

She admitted that is where all her troubling thoughts stemmed from. She was afraid to accept the peace she had in her life and her relationship with Peeta. She was afraid because when she let her guard down, life had the habit to send her a death sentence.

Her fears started replaying across her thoughts at that old fact. She kicked her covers off her and contemplated her impulse. She knew it was too soon, but she was never one to follow her rationality when she was in distress.

She got to her feet in the midnight darkness. She felt for her robe and placed it over her full set pajamas. She picked up her slippers, but didn't put them on.

She quietly threaded her way out of her room, then out of the house. Haymitch was awake somewhere in it. The precaution of noise was to avoid him having to awkwardly ask and her having to similarly answer.

She put on her slippers at the backdoor and silently walked the next distance.

She knew his backdoor would be unlocked as it always was. She took off her slippers nearby and crept through his home.

The layout was the same as all the other Victor Village's houses and she had been here enough the past two months to feel her way around his furniture in the dark.

She hesitated to call him a friend because he wasn't just that. They did normal friend things like begin projects together and help each other out with errands. Then they didn't do normal friend things like kiss until they were breathless and talk through their individual or mutual murders. Even if they didn't murder the deceased innocents directly, most the people added to their memory book and counting died for knowing them.

It all sounded grim, but being able to admit it out loud without entirely breaking down was healthy... at least according to Dr. Aurelius.

After she reached the second floor, she went in search of his sleeping whereabouts.

Although, he mentioned that sometimes he fell asleep in his art room, she found him in his bedroom.

From the limited light from the lampposts outside, she could see his sleeping position. He was on his side, facing the window with his back to the bedroom door.

She deliberated her next move. She didn't think the element of surprise was the best approach for either of them, not in the dark.

She advanced toward the bed by where his feet laid under his sheets, she shook one of them.

She nudged his blanketed feet with her hand and called his name.

It took a few tries, but finally Peeta jolted up right from his slumber.

He rubbed one of his eyes with the back of his hand and looked at her with the other.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, even though she wasn't.

"Katniss," he said in a tone that made it sound like he wasn't sure he really awake.

"Hey," she moved to sit opposite of him on the bed.

Peeta became more lucid, "What are you doing here?"

Katniss wasn't really going to reveal her anxieties to him, so she simply answered, "I couldn't sleep."

He scoffed, "So you came to bug me?"

She smiled, "Can I stay?"

Peeta raised an eyebrow at her, "And Haymitch?"

Katniss shrugged, "I don't think he will accept an invitation to join us on your bed."

"You're hilarious," Peeta deadpanned.

Katniss gave him a smirk in his direction.

He returned it.

"You can always stay."

Peeta pushed the covers forward and patted the room next to him.

She tossed her robe aside and lied down next to Peeta.

When Peeta fixed himself next to her, he pulled the covers up with him to conceal both of their bodies.

Katniss turned on her side, facing Peeta.

She reached for his hand and interlaced them together.

"Why do you have your prosthetic leg on?"

Peeta shrugged, "I forgot about it. I came home too tired from the bakery."

Peeta had paid a contractor and his employees to rebuild his family's bakery. It was a month away from being completed. It wasn't necessary for Peeta to go, but he still went over every day and helped with the labor.

Katniss sat up and pushed the covers off them. She gazed back at Peeta silently asking for permission. He slightly nodded his head. While he still had his work shirt on, he had removed his jeans leaving his lower half in boxer shorts. Katniss removed his metallic limb and placed it on the floor near his side.

When she repositioned herself back beside him, Peeta pulled her closer to him by the waist.

"Katniss," he whispered with a hint of concern.

She stroked his cheek with her thumb, "Yeah?"

Peeta closed his eyes at her touch.

He took minutes to respond.

"What are we? What does this relationship mean?"

Katniss didn't answer right away, she just kept the slow strum of her thumb on his face.

Peeta opened his eyes looking into hers.

"I know you don't want to hear this yet Katniss, but we-"

Her gaze lingered down to his lips and she leaned in to find them with hers. She kissed him softly at first and pulled back slightly to watch him. He smiled and waited. She kissed him again with a more passionate slant.

Katniss needed him to shut up. He was always rushing to label their interactions. She wasn't unsure of her feelings for him, she knew that much.

When they finally pulled away, Katniss searched for his hand.

"It means that we're each other's," she answered to his previous question when she found it.

She looked back to him, "Okay?"

Peeta smiled and accepted her answer, "Okay."

She turned in his arms, with her back to his chest.

Peeta spooned her, not in a sensual way, but in an affectionate serenity.

Katniss's mind as she assumed it would, quieted down when she was in his arms. She could only focus on the warmth of his body and the silent breathing on her neck.

Things were quiet for a while and it was no surprise that their bodies had easily remembered the other's embrace at night.

_I forgot how this felt._

"What?"

Had she thought that out loud?

She didn't respond.

Peeta insisted nuzzling her shoulder, "What was that?"

Katniss turned in his arms again, back to facing him.

She sighed, "I said I forgot how this felt."

"What exactly?"

Katniss placed her head on his chest.

"To feel safe… to feel safe in your arms."

Peeta lifted her chin, for her to look back at him.

"When I dreamt of home last year, this is what I rarely let myself visualize. Home isn't just the district or this house, but this moment right here."

Katniss kissed him on instinct.

She turned for the last time back to their spooning position and eventually they both drifted to a peaceful slumber.


End file.
